Forgiving breaks the unhealthy bonds between you and your abuser-victim relationship, and redefines you as an independent victor in your own life.
Forgiveness has nothing whatsoever to do with how wrong someone else was; no matter how evil, cruel, narcissistic or unrepentant they are. When you forgive a person, you break the ties with their ill deeds that keep you in anguish.
Forgiveness originates with self-love. Forgiveness is always and absolutely for you.
You have the power within yourself to find closure and healing, but not through bitterness, wrath and smoldering resentment.
Closure is an act of sanity you bring to the table of your own healing, it is not a handout your abuser holds over you that you need.
Whatever you do — don't wait to forgive someone until they apologize, ask for your forgiveness or even acknowledge they have harmed you. If you are waiting for someone to acknowledge they hurt you, you could be waiting forever and it puts them in the power position, where you need something from them in order to move forward in your life.
You think they made you feel this way, but when you won't forgive, you are the one inflicting the pain on yourself.
They got it started, but you keep it going. Forgive and let it go, or it will eat you alive.
They caused the first wound, but you are causing the rest; this is what not forgiving does.
When you give others a new chance, a new chance is really being given to you.
